why is it always making me think of the question and consequences?
argh....
flashback kept coming back...
is it a good or bad sign?
was at popeye..
suddenly my msg beep..
my heart skipped a beat when i realised the first alphabet starts with "L".
a part of me wants her to come find me and ask me whats wrong but on the other part, i really felt like avoiding because of the reality and the people im responsible for.
then i came to a sign of relief when i realise its a text from my dearest lin!
my childhood fren..
her mom invited me to kl and genting with them.
might be goin ba...
missed korea times with her babe! =)
not long after tt my phone rang..
and again my heart seems to stop beating when i realised its her.
hesitating if i should ans.
and again, i avoided..
passed the phone to peiye and i avoided the call..
as i am typing this, i received a text from her..
a long one and i jus couldnt control my tears..
there are jus so many things..
i always wanted to show ppl my strong front but i donno y, i always failed to do so.
breakin down in front of so many ppl before..
fuck it man.
when the text came in, i had this stong feeling its from her and true enough its her..
as i was lookin for my phone, my heart jus kept beating furiously.
i hate it when you use the hard way.
i will f hell dig out and return everything.
i will means i will.
dont force me to my wits end.
there are so many things which i really wanted to share with u.
even when i had the long champ deal..
knew u like it so much n really wanted to buy for u but i know its not the time.
why is all these happening..
lucky i was out today else i will jus break down.
mummy... where are u?
really really need u..
while thinkin wat to do i was thinkin of the beach at melbourne and galveston.
the very calm feeling...
felt like goin to a beach to sort out my feelings..
tot of askin someone to go with me..
i have someone in mind but i know u will keep questioning..
and it stopped me..
like my nick.. it was referring to u n no one else except u came to ask me..
and of cos i tried to change topic again..
i knew u didnt like it but u know i gotta overcome myself and be comfortable before saying it to u.
sigh... im sorry.
i really need someone whom i can talk to freely.
aunt kelly... where r u?
mummy sue ann where r u??
avoiding u is something which i really hated doing so much.
and something i can never do it..
but now is the period where i really couldnt take it anymore.
yet u used the hard way.
and i fuckin cannot stand it.
i had an extremely bad nightmare on the night before i went down.
and true enough, i jus walked off at 9pm.
even ignoring my sis for the very very first time talkin to her in such a f up tone.
sorrry darling sis!
i donno if anyone is still reading this blog.
whoever is reading it, pls do not question me unless u r really close to me.
and i really love mon night.
the way we communicated.
posted by RaChEw @ Thursday, June 03, 2010
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home